Thursday, May 22, 2008

Starve a fever, feed a c-section

Now that I'm no longer eating for two, I guess it's safe to say that I'm just a pig. I was hoping that my appetite would diminish once I had the baby, but no way - if anything it's gotten a bit bigger.

My deflated two-c-sections-in-two-years stomach depresses me.

I called my OB's office this morning looking for a little reassurance that the amount of pain I'm still in is within the boundaries of normal and not indicative that I have massive organ damage and internal bleeding. Last night was awful, and every time I moved I was afraid I'd leave behind a big pile of uterine stew. They wanted to see me right away - of course - which made me worry that THEY thought I had massive organ damage and internal bleeding. All was well, though, and the verdict was that I'm simply overdoing it. The doctor did say that, despite the common misconception, subsequent c-sections can be harder as far as healing and pain management because everything is more stretched out and can take longer to heal. Why did everyone tell me the opposite, then? Cruel, cruel, cruel. I did, however, walk out of there with a prescription for a stronger narcotic. Sweet. I probably won't fill it, though, because I imagine it will render me unconscious and even more useless than I already am. Still - it's nice to have it in my hand. I could probably sell it for a nice price.

Savannah is one week old today. Hard to believe that I was lying like a slab of meat on a cold steel table this time last week. I know I promised the story of the surgery and hospital stay - it's a-comin', probably this weekend. She's simply amazing. Eats like a champ. Sleeps like an angel, except for the middle of the night feed - then it's party time. All of her 0-3 months clothes are way too big because she's such a peanut. I have no idea where she gets her slight frame from. Baby boy is also a bit petite for his age. Must be the Irish in them. She had a weight check at the doctor's office yesterday, and while I was undressing her I noticed that her cord had fallen off, leaving a gaping bloody hole in the middle of her stomach. The pediatric nurse had to pretty much catch me from nearly fainting at the sight. Baby boy's button actually had to be cauterized because it was so bloody and open. I don't typically have a weak stomach, but seeing it yesterday almost brought me to my knees and my breakfast to the floor.

I want a new camera. I want a camera that will make my photos look fabulous, despite the photographically handicapped person behind it. Any suggestions, readers? I have a Kodak EasyShare C875, and I hate it. It's a thorn in my side. I would love a big, fancy $1000 camera, but I doubt my husband will allow me to blow our stimulus check on a camera.

Baby boy is a monster. I'm pretty convinced that he hates me and is plotting my death, a la Stewie in The Family Guy. He's entering the terrible twos stage already, and combined with his demonic possession adjustment to his baby sister, he's not a fun tot to be around. I hope with all of my heart that it passes, and that it passes soon. It's difficult to not let it all hurt my feelings.

I hate being stuck in the house. No driving for 2 weeks. No travel for 4. Nothing in the vagina for 6. Oh darn. I'm dying to get out of the house, but even going for a walk around the block at this point would be painful. Hubs goes back to work next week and my mom is driving up to spend the week here to help out. I'm hoping by then I can get out for some fresh air and a few moments of quiet time. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to do this alone when my help has gone, but I'm pretending that it won't happen if I don't think about it.

Where'd that prescription go?


Andrew and Connor's Mom said...

McK--Savannah is so beautiful and the name is so perfect.

Dan & Misty said...

ok, so I have to know, what did the doc do about Savannah's cord? Do they just leave it as is or do you have to put something on it? Tell me tell me because if it happens to me I will die - I am such a wuss.

Sorry about all the pain you are in. :(

Go with a Nikon (I think they're the best). I need a new camera too!!

Kelly-AB said...

LOVE the pics!!!

Hope the pain gets better....FAST! I had both vaginally and the second reconvery was much more painful as well. I think our body just says "Why in the HELL would you ever do that a 2ND TIME!"

Hope little man is adjusting well. I think every little boys job is to hurt their momma's feelings. Try not to take things to heart and expect it to happen more often as they get older! :(

I just got a Cannon Rebel off of Ebay and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! Takes A-M-A-Z-I-N-G photos!

Matter Of Fact Mommy said...

mckenzie, i was on your site reading this and then left the comment page up for, like 45 minutes because i got distracted by the darling babes. anyway, re-writing this comment, but it won't be anywhere near as good as it was the first time...

because of the hormones and the added strain of adding another little human being to take care - particularly a human being at "the amoeba stage" - you will go through a roller coaster of emotions. i remember, when BS was newborn and i was breastfeeding her every 3 hours, i would actually get MAD at her for taking away most of the affection i used to give to her big brother. it was as though i had no affection left to give to him... the little boy i had loved with all of my heart for the 2 1/2 years prior to her arrival...

then, at some point, the hormones were back on track and i started to realize that i can love both of my children with all my heart.

we all handle this post-partum stuff differently, so you may be perfectly fine and not have any "bad" feelings.

i just want you to know that you are not alone in any of the feelings that you may be experiencing.

big hugs to you and your beautiful family! :)


How darling she is. It surely doesn't take away the pain and depression and all of the stress that children bring, though.
As a mom of two older children, I can tell you that this too will pass. The stages go so much quicker with two. Trust me. You'll be loving it when they are old enough to play together. For now, just hang on and take those meds!

Jessica said...

wonderful name, baby boy will adjust.. it took Big C about 4months to adjust. Hope u get out and some fresh air. She is a doll, McK.